It is well to remember that there are five reasons for drinking: the arrival of a friend, ones present or future thirst, the excellence of the cognac, or any other reason.W. #19. Heres toasting to your health. When a ghost drinks boos, they get sheet-faced. So fill your glass to anything "May you have all the happiness and luck that life can hold, and at the end of your rainbows, may you find a pot of gold.". ", "I would rather be here, with the people in this room, than with the best people in the world! Dont know if Ive lived in sin So lets get wasted all of the time, and have the time of our life. The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift because its the present. Four blessings upon you. So we may know them by their silence. The next party is justifiable with this drinking quote, even to your mom. Funny short toasts. 34. If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. 62.) However, I assure you that this page still has the best funny drinking toasts for friends youll find. If you like this joke, youll also like these 60 best, most hilarious Rodney Dangerfield jokes and quotes. "Here's to lying, cheating, stealing, and drinkingIf you're going to lie, lie for a friend. 31.) May we live to learn wellAnd learn to live well. Scottish, With this glass, rich and deep The weird turn pro. 43.) ", "Here's to you and here's to me The best of friends we'll ever be. But if you must lie, lie in each other's arms. If youre amused by these Irish toasts, youll also be amused by these 11 funniest Irish jokes. Check to see if it is in Getz I You shall perhaps not do it tomorrow May the saddest day of your future be no worse than the happiest day of your past. Fields, What shall we drink to? -Here's to honor: to getting honor, keeping honor, and not getting off her 'til you get off honor. Dance like nobodys watching., #20. But a whiskey glass and a fat girls ass are home sweet home to me. There are good ships, and there are wood ships, ships that sail the sea, but the best ships are friendships, and may they always be., 6. Tolkien, 81.) There is no drinking after death. The Irish are famous for their colorful sayings and quotes. Sometimes its nice to have a common toast ready that works in every situation. a company that you keep. (pronounced Ban-awch(k)-tee nah Fay-leh Paw-rig ur-iv!) Some of them are totally inappropriate. The next time you're feeling stumped and speechless, feel free to keep one of these in your back pocket and you're sure to get a few cheers, tears and even a few raised beers. But enough about me, heres to you. Francois Villon, Heres to whiskey, scotch and rye May you live to be 100 years, with one extra year to repent. A pretty girl and an honest one Top drinking toasts. | TexAgs 41.) Tasteless Toasts | insultants I don't know about you, but I'm the least articulate person around after a few beers. 35.) But always be on your way. A child every year to you. Now let's get to drinking! Next to a circus, there aint nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit., #27. Of course, for this they need a Russian company. Irish Birthday Toasts. It is better to spend money like there's no tomorrow than to spend tonight like there's no money. George Bernard Shaw, Drink today and drown all sorrow 10.) Heres to alcohol, the rose-colored glasses of life.F. Thank you for reading. This maybe the last time We see this cup. 12.) 33.) ", "To the kisses we've snatched and vice versa! Heres to staying positive and testing negative! May the hinges of our friendship never grow rusty. And if you drink, may you drink with me. And give to your friend this very day This one is a great traditional Toast to show your friends that the moments you share with them are never a waste of life. Tthan to spend tonight like theres no money. May all your ups and downs be under the covers! ". When we get drunk, we fall asleep. Fuc-King! Here's to champagne for our real friends, and a real pain to our sham friends. 47.) May the stay there be as enjoyable as the way there. As per my agreement with AI company, Im supposed to tell you that the paragraph above was written by AI, though I made a few edits. 14. Heres to Dame Fortune;May she smile upon you.May you never meet her daughter, Miss Fortune. Heres to the great artistic genius, Pablo Picasso. Than an anonymous alcoholic. Collection. Heres to the glass we love so to sip,It dries many a pensive tear;Tis not so sweet as a womans lipBut a damned sight more sincere. Heres to a long life and a merry one, a quick ending and a happy one, a good girl and a pretty one, a cold bottle and another one., #2. Dec 10, 2020 - Explore Bryan Englehart's board "Drinking toasts" on Pinterest. Thu, Mar 17, 2011 at 9:12 am. 22.) If you post mine. Gallery: 1/9. To the new couple: Never sweat the petty things, but always pet the sweaty things. Heres to the nights well never rememberWith our friends, well never forget. A cold drinkand another one. March 8, 2022 January 24, 2023 Performance Relationship Spirituality by Igor. 2.) Happy birthday! 36. To work the easiest device man has invented to escape boredom.. May misfortune follow you the rest of your life,And never catch up. Heres to staying positive and testing negative. Little fools drink too much, and great fools not at all! To our health: May we all live to be as old as my jokes. This Irish toast is perfect for you if you are an honest fellow. I used to know a clever toast.But now I cannot think it.So fill your glass to anything.And damn your souls, Ill drink it. It can also be seen as disrespect towards the person or thing being toasted. 10.) Enter your email address below to get Food News delivered straight to your inbox. Youre on the funny Toasts for Drinking page. Four and twenty highballs Tears make you braver. The sweets of life mirth, music, love, and wine. 3.) Anonymous To the rapturous, wild, and ineffable pleasure Of drinking at somebody else's expense. Check out these fun and interesting beer quotes. 13.) Theyre perfect for any party. 53.) So fill your glass to anything, And damn your souls, I'll drink it!" "I love to drink martinis. Here's to the ones we love dearest and most. MDM, It is better to spend money like theres no tomorrow But the ocean's not beer and I'm not a duck, so let's drink these pints and get messed up. It is customary to take a sip of your drink when someone toasts you. 16.) Who keeps his word and does not hedge Anonymous, Heres to this one A good girl and an honest one,. Scottish, Tis better to buy a small bouquet 58.) Still, standing up, lifting your glass, and making eye contact with those you are toasting before speaking is often customary. But wheres the fun in that? Because weve already lost our minds. The day after. After all, a good sense of humor is important in every relationship. Anonymous, To the rapturous, wild, and ineffable pleasure To the bottle, I goTo heal my heart and drown my woeRain may fall, and wind may blowAnd many miles be still to goBut under a tall tree will I lieAnd let the clouds go sailing by.J.R.R. 21.) Let us have wine and women, mirth and laughter,Sermons and soda-water the day after.Lord Byron, 77.) May they continue to manipulate world events to their advantage and keep us mere humans in the dark. And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap. Time is a waste of life. Whether you want to say a little more than 'Happy birthday' or you're celebrating an anniversary, bringing up your favorite toast is always appreciated. It is always nice to receive a blessing of some kind at a special ceremony. [15 August 2003. by Anonymous (it is in email archive --JP). Heres Why Champagne Is Fucking Overrated, The Fire Inside: The Great Drunkards and What They Drank. We hope you found some quote within this list that suits you and represents you as a character. But a whiskey glass and a fat girl's ass are home, sweet home to me. MDM, Better a well known drunkard Some ships are wooden ships. If drinking beer, Could bring her back here, I'd drink the damn place dry, Yes, I'd drink the damn place dry! Patrick Dennis, Steady your glasses "Here's health to those I love and wealth to those who love me." "Be the change you wish to see in the world." Gandhi. As you can see, there are many ways to give a toast. 9. Powered by BizBudding Inc. 10 Funny Irish Toasts That Are Easy To Memorize, 15 Dirty Irish Pick Up Lines That Will Probably Get You Slapped, 10 Rejected St. Patricks Day Playlist Songs. Drinking Toasts: How to Say Cheers in 35 Different Languages At break of day Please share this page with your friends on social media right now because that will help me to continue publishing totally awesome stuff for you and everyone else. What King? So please read this section until the end because the best funny toast is at the end. I know its Christmas, but heres to another day of being at the office, because once again, Im doing all the work and some fat guy in a suit keeps getting all the credit.. 83.) 44.) Heres to women. Always remember to forgetThe things that made you sad.But never forget to rememberThe things that made you glad. If you Drink, may you drink with me. Looking for more great toasts? Heres the whores When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. What's the dirtiest cheers or toast you know to say before drinking or Youll find the right toast for any occasion, including old Irish toasts and famous quotes to use as toasts. Honor to the brave A quick death and an easy one So lets drink this drink S shes a major pain in the ass. Best. Attention, all you wonderful humans! And vodka makes you not remember any of that crap. Irish Toasts: Drinking, Funny Toasts, Christmas, New Years and Others Hes good people. 30.) Artificial intelligence wrote some of them. There is no set rule for starting a toast. To help those who hate being put on the spot we've combed through Reddit and found 27 of the best toasts to use for almost any occasion. If you like what you read above, youll also like these 20 really funny Scottish jokes. No retreat no surrender. May they have rich fathers and beautiful mothers., 5. Typically, a toast is a type of cheer where someone raises their glass and gives a speech or salute to honor someone or something. Pour me some I drank to your health alone. Heres to the land of the shamrock so green. 27 Best Drinking toasts ideas - Pinterest Time is never wasted. When we drink to the usual, we 10 Funny Drinking Toasts You Probably Haven't Heard - Heavy.com 13. #25. Better to be a well-known drunkard than an anonymous alcoholic. 20. "May we all be alive at this same time next year." "May you live as long as you want, and never want as long as you live." "May the best day of your past be the worst day of your future." In the third year of marriage, they both speak and the neighbors listen., #16. And Heaven when you die. Here's to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking. Here are some examples of funny business toasts to give you an idea of what toasting should be like in formal occasions. 7.) If you're going to cheat, cheat death. The past is history, the future is a mystery, but today is a gift, because its the present. on Dirty toasts for St. Patrick's Day drunks. These HILARIOUS TOASTS Will Leave You - YouTube They believed clinking glasses would release the gods blessings into their drinks. Show off your lyrical skills and impress your friends with this fun rhyme. AI created all these toasts about aliens.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[300,250],'humoropedia_com-large-leaderboard-2','ezslot_5',618,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-humoropedia_com-large-leaderboard-2-0'); Do you like the funny toasts youve just read? I drank to your health alone. But its not only about me as I discovered, making content for other people is incredibly satisfying. monitoring_string = "f4e9a55d2640cb37b28a2b021fc63f8b", Group of friends celebrating with champagne; Photo credit: Flashpop(Getty Images), Friends Toasting Wineglasses During Party; Photo credit: Mirko Vitali / EyeEm (Getty Images). An Irish Toast for a Bachelor. Cheers to beers and legs behind your ears. Ill do the same. But please don't tell his wife! If you like what you read, youll also like these Thanksgiving jokes. May your love life be more exciting than anything youve seen. To your genitalia: May they never fail ya, or jail ya. May you. You might like Old Fashioned Quotes, Captions & Jokes. In ancient times, friends would share drinks from a communal cup, and cheering was a way to show trust in one another and the drinks purity. From Drinking Song, J. Webley: A toast to Mary, A girl I once loved, Oh Lord, why do things have to die? Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives and to the good life, whatever it is and wherever it happens to be.Hunter S. Thompson, 69.) Mirth and laughter Naturally, they have quite a few that are just right for New Year's Eve. MGrooms94 10 yr. ago. If youre looking for more party ideas, check out the rest of our collection. Beannachta na File Pdraig oraibh! We drink to those who fuck us, and fuck those who dont!, 15. a Air Force Pilot bawdy recitation (can be found on "A Night At ", "Here's to the storks that bring good babies, the crows that bring bad babies, and the swallows that bring no babies at all! 74.) Well, I hope you do, because I, Roman Marshanski, the founder of Humoropedia, wrote them. I wont, I shant, I dont! but just for you, I will.. All Illustrations: Aida Amer (Glassware: Boleslaw Kubica/ Shutterstock) Raise your glass and sing a song of celebration! I dont! but just for you, I will.. Here's to those who sit when they pee. I just gotta let him in. May you get so drunk you end up in Las Vegas at the Let It Ride table where the white tigers will be riding yourself. | What's New | If the ocean was beer and I was a duck, I would swim to the bottom and drink myself up. May the rocks in your field turn to gold. May you turn into a magician of seduction every time you meet a hot chick. But a damn sight more sincere. 75.) _____ On the heart of each sister . May God bless old Ireland, that's this . It has that sauciness of Irish drinking toasts, and it's better than just saying, "Drink up!" "My friends are the best friends. May you have nicer legs than yours under the table before the new spuds are up. Thatll take our lives If you Steal, may you steal a lovers heart. May all your ups and downs be between the sheets. Pain makes you stronger. "Here's champagne for our real friends, and real pain for our sham friends.". Not the heat that brings down barns and shanties, but the heat that brings down bras and panties. Drink to life and the passing show And the eyes of the prettiest girl you know. A Christmas wish May you never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten., #26. It is a sign of appreciation and acceptance of the toast. I would rather be with the people in this room than with the finest people I know. Spanish, I used to know a clever toast Sure, you could just say cheers before taking a sip of your drink. If you have a bawdy or erotic toast, please send it to me at .